Home Is Where The Home Is

WARNING: This entry of my blog is filled with meandering and, at times, incoherent/disconnected ideas and stories. Stream of consciousness is the only way to get it all out there.


It has been several weeks since my last post regarding my tip to Xi'an and final days in Beijing. A lot has happened since then. Well, maybe not outwardly. I mean the world is still turning, Bush is still president, and the Earth is still the third closest planet to the sun. For me, inside me, I feel like my time in China was merely a dream. What makes it more real for me is being able to tell my stories and remembering situations and places that are forever burned into my memory. Now that I am back it feels like my time in China was just a dream but I know when I go back to Beijing I will see my time in the US as the dream.

Things change in a year. Friends move away and get new jobs. M&M's go to dark chocolate. People grow a year older. Loved ones get sick. Friends get married and buy houses. McDonald's gets a new chicken wrap. All these changes, big and small, combined to give me a fair amount of culture shock upon my return.

The United States seems like the richest, cleanest, most futuristic place on earth. Downey wrinkle releaser. This is a spray that 'releases' wrinkles. We need that in China. Where are all the piles of used coals and used sticks that formerly had fried meats on them? You mean I don't have to grab napkins every time I want to go to the bathroom? I have to stand in line?

There were a whole lot of old things that became new again. I think this is the greatest benefit of travel. Once you return you begin to look at things differently. You see that there is more than one way to do everything. You gain a new appreciation for the simple things in your life and begin to think about the things that matter. I am so glad I was out of the country for all the Anna Nicole/Paris Hilton/Lindsey Lohan "news stories". I had very little tolerance for that stuff before and now it makes my blood boil.

Anyway, things that were old and are new again/things I missed and didn't even know: beds (sooooo soft), chairs (not 8 inches from the ground), baseball, swimming pools, hot dogs, ceiling fans, thick carpet, central air, driving, different kinds of beer, communicating in my native language, and ice. Ice is the best.

I have gained 10 pounds since returning from China. While there I lost 20 so I guess I am still 10 down but wow. It took cheese three weeks to do what six months of Chinese food did. I have been hitting all my old favorite restaurants in what can only be described as a gastronomic tour of the United States. While in Texas I indulged in Whataburger and a Taco Cabana within an hour of landing. The next few days were spent on Lee Hamilton's famous smoked chicken, Tex-Mex, and pizza. Upon returning to St. Louis I had a gyro, hot dog, nachos, chicken wings, chili, patty melt, fried okra, hot dogs, and fried chicken. These are all things I will go without for another year.

I have gotten back on a regiment of eating a little smarter and working out a little bit more. I really miss playing basketball. That was my primary form of exercise but here in the US there are fewer public places to play and fewer people playing. In a country of 1.3 billion you always have someone to play with.

One thing I noticed right away as I flew into LAX from Seoul was golf courses. I have flown to many parts of China and have never seen one golf course. Between Santa Barbara and LA, I saw almost a dozen. Land use in the US seems so well thought out. Zoning is key to this. In the US we have a very clear distinction between commercial and private areas. Whats more we have certain kinds of shops in certain zones. In China it is not uncommon to walk by a restaurant, next to a kids clothing store, with a porn shop next to that, and all these places will have apartments directly above them.


All that has been written prior to this point was written in the USA now I am back in China.


My time in the US was a lot of fun. I arrived in San Antonio on the 16th of July and spent a week there visiting with my father, sister, and grandmother. My grandmother had surgery while I was in town so I was unable to see her as much as I would have liked. Most of my time in SA was spent pursuing food and enjoying American TV. Now that I think about it, those two themes were echoed in St. Louis as well. We had planned a trip to go tubing but it rained every day while I was in SA. I found out later that they had more rain in the month of July than they averaged for the entire year. A lot of rain.

On July 22nd I returned to St. Louis. It was great to see the house at Beacon Hill and, of course, Bari. My mother took off work for the first week I was back so we spent some quality time hanging out at the pool. It was really very nice. I even got to go back to Columbia for a few days and helped Kevin move from there to his new apartment in St. Louis. It was good to see the changes that Columbia has gone through. Back in St. Louis I visited with family and friends at Garry's DVD release/Welcome Home Blake party. It was fun to see Garry's DVD of the trip he, my mother, and Kevin took in May when they came to visit me in Beijing. While I was in town my other grandmother was in the hospital as well. I seem to have a negative effect on my grandmothers and their health. Hopefully they will both do a lot better without my bad vibes impeding their recoveries.


In St. Louis I spent a lot of time catching up with friends and just trying to enjoy being an American in America. In that vein I attended 5 Cardinals games in the four weeks I was in St. Louis. The Cardinals were 5-0 with 5 come from behind victories in games I attended. They also went from 8 games under .500 to just one on the day of my departure. Go Cardbirds.


One week before I left my friend Brian Tash had his bachelor party. It was great for many unmentionable reasons but the very best thing about it was that it brought a lot of my friends together for the first time in a long time. It was a fitting tribute to Brian and I really appreciate him moving the party up a few weeks so I could be there. Thanks Bri.


The end of my trip came so quickly that I was a bit shocked and dismayed when I realized I was leaving in a matter of days. How could I be leaving? I just got there? There were still a lot more things that I wanted to do. A lot more people to see and talk to. More food to eat. As the end came I kind of freaked out. I hadn't mentally prepared myself for my return to China. I was having way too much fun and I began to question my decision to come back. The thinking was if there are so many people I care about in one place why not stay in that country and enjoy their company. I really thought coming here would be easier the second time around but it was harder because I saw everyone I missed so dearly and wanted to bask in the glow of their love and friendship for a bit longer.

Now that I am here I realize that my decision to return, albeit tough, was the right one. The good thing about coming back the second time is that I immediately felt at home. I really feel as comfortable here as I did in the USA. The one glaring difference is the company I keep. I am happy to be back yet I long for the days I had by the pool with an assorted cast of characters and all the laughs and conversations with friends and family. Beijing feels like home to me and that makes me happy and confident that this year will be an application of all the things I learned last year. This year I will be able to expand my knowledge and have even more new and exciting experiences. I feel incredibly lucky to feel at home in two totally different cultures. I feel incredibly lucky to have the friends and family that I do on two sides of the Pacific.

Today I look at apartments and try to get my head around working 9-5 again. Stay tuned for updates on my ever changing circumstances and manic thought process.